Totally Backlogged, But Gotta Start Somewhere

Ohhhh do I feel bad about not updating this blog more often. Yikes!! I have good reasons though. Well, OK, fine. Only one good reason that expired almost 20 days ago: My family was here!! SO awesome and SO amazing!! But, let me be honest: As I sit down to write this, I'm coming off of a very disheartening day. For the greater part of the day I have been trying to remind myself of all the numerous blessings God has been providing for me every day. I've been trying to keep those positive thoughts at the forefront of my mind, but I'm still just feeling downright down. Today, two hours before I was scheduled to teach my first journalism course (an elective), I learned it was cancelled because only one student signed up; other students (grade 11-12) signed up for drama, photography, business, etc. It broke my heart. Truly. And, I had just finished putting together an AWESOME intro to journalism PowerPoint on what is media and the role of journalism. I was completely psyched and went from a super high to a super low. Now, as I type, I'm trying to find the balance of somewhere in between again; that good, nay great, place I was in just yesterday.

The best news is my life has been filled with SO MANY things to be thankful for. God is providing and I am SO grateful for His love and grace. I could not be doing any of this without Him. One of the great joys was having my mom, dad and sister come for two weeks over Christmas break. We spent a few days running around Dar, then up to Arusha, next on to safari before returning to Arusha and back home to Dar. A separate post to come on that incredible time!!!

For now, I feel like I should just write what comes to my head. Life feels normal here, so it's hard to pick out exactly what to write about. To me, the following will probably be random thoughts, but for you it will be a good overall of various aspects here, both trivial and not-so-trivial.

I'm eating a lollipop right now. (Score one for trivial!) They are one of my highlights here. It's my last one so gotta go to the store soon. Food here is definitely one of my, well, I wouldn't say challenges, but subjects that make me miss home I guess you could say. Take anything back home in California, take away half the flavor and that's pretty much what everything is like here. I am lucky my family brought me a luggage of goodies, which I'm consuming sparingly because when they're gone, they're gone! I might sound ghetto revealing this, but one of the first places I want to eat when I get home is Sizzler. I miss lettuce soooooooo much and dream of eating salads again!! Oh and those diced ham bits on top! You can occasionally find lettuce here, but it is a real pain to clean it (i.e. prep by soaking in bleach water, etc.) and to be sure it's totally rid of bacteria.

Speaking of bacteria, I have been so lucky (*knock on wood!!*) that I have had pretty darn good health here. I'm always scared to say (or write) such things because I don't want to jinx myself. I will admit that for the past three and a half months I have been holding my breath waiting for something really stressful or extremely challenging to happen. It hasn't. Thanks be to God!! Oh, and can I get an AMEN for dropping a pant size? Hooray! I eat so much less here; smaller portions, less snacking, fresher meals, lots of water. And of course sweating and walking to/from/around school add to it too!

I love our house lady. (No transition there, sorry.) We have two actually. Esther comes three times a week and cleans and bakes bread, and Jacki comes once a week to cook. We've only had Jacki make fruit salad so far, but boy is that an effort. Everything, especially food prep, takes longer here, and fruit especially takes time. I rejoice having these two beautiful, hardworking women in my home. I especially love when I come home to a bed that is made so crisply that someone would think it was ironed. (I only have a tight sheet and a loose sheet for my bedding here; no comforters or duvets--no way!) But more than the perfectly made bed is how adorable it is to see my Stitch doll (a la "Lilo & Stitch") propped up in difference places. Esther and Jacki do an incredible job taking care of my home and I am so thankful. Sometimes items in my bedroom will be moved around and I smile because I think it's entertaining for them to redecorate and see all the different ways the can style the room. Just the other day when I came home from school, I entered and said "hodiii" (may I enter) and Esther, in a happy and high-pitched voice, sang from the kitchen "karibuuu!" (welcome) They are great women.

The heat has not been bad except for the last week of December/first week fo January. I think it was because Arusha was cold (i.e. 70 degrees) and my body wasn't into getting thrown back into the high temperatures and humidity. I actually don't notice how humid it is until, like the other night, I realize my body is so drenched I literally have to take out a towel and dry myself off. That was the other evening when I was getting ready to go out. I don't use the air conditioner in my bedroom. Never had A/C at home, so I don't totally know what I'm missing. Plus, I always wanted a ceiling fan and using that lets me keep my two sets of windows open so I can enjoy the view from my room. But, I definitely notice (and struggle with) the heat when the power goes out at school. We don't use the air conditioners when we are getting power from the generator, so when I'm in my office (sans fan), I sit there and just soak in my own sweat. Lesson planning is impossible and grading is totally out of the question. I just cannot think straight! However, when Heather (the grade 6-8 English teacher) isn't teaching in our English classroom, I can move my office work in there because the ceiling fans are rockin'. I also get hot when I walk home from school and the sun is blazing down on me. TZ is like 11 degrees south of the equator or something, so the sun's strength is major. Shade is awesome here! Oh, and cloud cover!! I love mornings when I walk to school in the "shade" because the sun is hiding behind the big ol' clouds.

God has been good in answering prayers. One of my goals for the new year (no "resolutions" this year, just "goals") was to enjoy my classes more. Not that I wasn't enjoying them; I was. I just knew that I could really appreciate my lessons, teaching and students more. And I have been. The month is half over and every class period I have ended with a smile on my face. I feel like my students are learning more, too, so that is very rewarding. I am planning on starting a creative writing club and eventually publish a student literary journal, complete with a "book launch" affair that will be a collaboration between the English, art and music departments. Kind of like a night of the arts! Also want to do a speech and debate club.

However, time is working against me. Term 2 and term 3 go so fast. In fact, between April 1 and May 6, I only have 12 teaching days with my students in grades 10-12 (due to Service Emphasis Week and spring break). May 6 is their last day at school before the go on home study leave for end-of-the-year examinations. I will be teaching my grade 9 until the last day of school, June 17. The next six months are going to fly by, and I already feel like the last day of school will get here and I will be saying "it's all over?!?!?!" I had actually been dreading my family leaving because then it would leave a six-month abyss before me. However, God had other plans and I am doing great and receiving amazing news every day. In fact, Dave is coming to see me!! He leaves San Diego on my birthday (March 24 for those of you playing along at home) and arrives in Dar two days later on Erin's (my roomie's) birthday! Just in time for the parrrtayyy! Haha He is staying an incredible two weeks and I thank God for this opportunity for him and for me and for us.

I am happy here, to say the least. I give every day up to God and He gives me the strength and the patience and the ability to carry on. Not just carry on, but to live. A life here is not easy, and I by no means mean to make is appear so. However, with constant thankfulness I am able to enjoy this Tanzanian life and feel like I belong. Life is normal, and I love it.

L