Things I do because I've lived in Tanzania (#1-10)

I've been on "summer" for about four hours now. And it feels great to be alone in my apartment. I love being home and can't wait to enjoy my little place more during the mornings/afternoons for the next few months.

About two months ago I really started to make an effort at transitioning to life back in the States. I know, by that point I'd already been home nine months, the same amount of time I was even in TZ. But when I came home last June, I immediately occupied myself with finding a job, then found one, then dealt with transitioning/adjusting to it, then got engaged (whoo!), and then... then I finally started getting my life organized bit by bit, and in March realized it was time to focus on me. 


Repatriation is the word, and it means returning and adjusting to your country of origin. Handling repatriation is a very important step in taking care of yourself—mind, body and soul. Just as there are transitions to deal with as an ex-pat abroad, there is processing to be done once you've returned home. March was when I started paying attention to this and finally started taking steps to process my life in Dar.

One of those steps was reading this article. I read it multiple times within days of finding it and I think about what I read in it all the time.

So here I am. "Summer." Time on my hands to plan our wedding and hunt for a teaching job, but most importantly for me, time to process my beautiful life in Dar es Salaam.

To start, I've decided to compile a list of quirky habits I picked up living in Tanzania. The way these habits continue to pop up truly amazes me, as I've been home 11 months now. It sure doesn't seem like it. Not at all.

Things I do because I've lived in Tanzania (#1-10)

1. Make sure my computer is always 80%+ charged. (Because you never know when the power will go out and you need something to keep you entertained at home after dark!)

2. Throw away perfectly good milk (sometimes opened, sometimes unopened) from the fridge because it's been in there a week. (And therefore must have gone bad since the power goes out and things can't keep in the fridge longer than 2 days max.)

3. Lay on my bed and watch the trees move in the breeze outside my window. (Because what else is there to do with the power is out and I'm about to die of heatstroke?)

4. Don't respond to text messages in a timely manner. (Because I how can I when I get more than two a day?)

5. Force myself to wash my hair regularly (which I do! It's just forced LOL Sorry, sounds gross LOL) (Because in my imagination brushing out my wet hair will will take forever—15 min—and I fear it will seriously hurt.)

6. Turn off even the smallest outlet/charger when not being used. (Because you don't want to run out of electricity! Save it! Save it!)

7. Crave ramen—and only ramen—for dinner on a sweltering day. (Because that's all I can cook on days without power! As in every other day, pretty much.)

8. Happily watch TV shows/movies on my laptop instead of on a bigger screen TV. (Because anything's bigger than my 8-inch DVD player in Dar.)

9. Drive without the radio/music. (Because, unless it's a "party bajaj," I only have the sound of life to listen to as I go along!)

10. Wear my hair any way except in a messy bun. (Because when you live in humidity and wear it up for nine months straight, messy bun takes on a new meaning: hot mess.)

Joyfully,

LG

What It Means to Know Me

My best friend in TZ recently shared these two verses with me and they have already had a profound effect on my heart as I begin to reflect on my experiences here.

Jeremiah 22:16 

¹⁶ He defended the cause of the poor and needy,
   and so all went well.
Is that not what it means to know me?”
   declares the Lord.

Isaiah 58:10-11

¹⁰ and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
   and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
   and your night will become like the noonday.
¹¹ The Lord will guide you always;
   he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
   and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
   like a spring whose waters never fail. 


 L

The Bigger Picture

As I look back on this blog, it doesn't capture even a speck of my life and experiences here in Dar es Salaam. But honestly my goal was to have one post a month and I succeeded, and such a minimal goal was no mistake.

Awhile ago (December, actually), I decided I would post more about my TZ experiences after I got home. I believe this will allow for more honest and thorough stories, and will serve as a great processing device once I am back on the Pacific coast.

It might sound silly, but I believe I will be able to describe and retell the scents, sounds, tastes, feels, images, pain, laughter, struggles, victories better once I am stateside rather than while I am here. You see, long ago most aspects of my life in Tanzania became normal, so it's harder to fully and adequately write about them. It's a challenge to write about everyday things, especially when, once I'm back in California, they will be so much more than everyday things. The life I have created here is invaluable to me, and I want to honor it in a way it deserves. This means writing about it later, not logging it live.

There are three weeks left until I board the plane out of Julius K. Nyerere International Airport. The anticipation of departure weighs heavy on my heart. I force myself to think about what I'm excited about back home, but the first things I came up with are actually quite lame: Shopping. Food. A bigger, comfier bed. Yes, these are nice things, but it just makes me feel so superficial, and dare I say a tad bit like an ugly American.

In an effort to push through such trivialities and gain momentum in my excitement, I've started identifying personal interests I'll want to be disciplined about when I get home: Spending time outdoors daily. Jogging, dancing, bike riding. Walking places and using public transit. Being present with others. Meeting new people. Being more diverse in recreational choices. Pursuing my passion for global development and all the angles it entails.

One regret I have continually struggled with is not being involved with a nonprofit here. My dream job is to work for Camfed and the Camfed Tanzania office is only a 20-minute bajaj ride away. What is wrong with me? To be fair, my first month here I sent out numerous emails to a few agencies hoping to hear some response to my I-want-to-volunteer-and-I'll-do-anything offer. Never heard anything from any of them. Most addresses listed on their websites are P.O. boxes, so, for the most part, I'm not able find an actual office location to just show up at.

Still, the more I think about it, the more it all just sounds like excuses in my mind and a hugely wasted opportunity. I keep trying to believe that what I've done with my time here is exactly what God wanted of me. But I really struggle with that. It's especially inconceivable because I know I am called to international development. My life after Dar will take me into it. I know it. Those are His plans for me, somehow. So that is why it's confusing as to why I wasn't more hands-on with it here, why there weren't more open doors and less red tape. Maybe I didn't try hard enough. I don't think I tried hard enough.

My 2010-2011 time in Dar is almost over. I can't go back or gain more of it. And feeling this way will eventually be detrimental to the overall joy of my memories here. I must remember the bigger picture.

Sisters at William's village, May 2011

Yesterday, like most Saturday mornings since I've been here, I went to William's village. As we drove away in the bajaj, bumping and bouncing like mad along the rough dirt road, I finally realized that I had gotten involved. I had been a part of something that will forever have a place in my heart. I suspect that what I have been filled with from William's village is the equivalent of what I could have would have gained at a nonprofit here. The only difference is I won't have a letterhead to prove it or to express what it was or what I did. What we did.

So I must look at the bigger picture of it all, and to me that is change and sustainability. Improved lives with lasting effects. Perhaps loving on those children week after week wasn't the most grand of sustainable gestures, but showing them that they matter, planting a seed of self-worth and value in them, will hopefully endure even after I am half a world away. Development must start somewhere, I keep telling myself, and I am reminded of this through one of my favorite quotes:

"Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could do only a little." —Edmund Burke

As I wrap up my life here (literally, as I might start packing today), I will keep those faces, those personalities, in my mind. They forever changed me, and I pray one day they will be given the opportunities to shine their brightest and improve their country, a place already filled with so many beautiful and magnificent people.


L

Photo Post: Easter Break in Egypt

My housemate and best gal pal in TZ, Erin, and I went to Cairo, Egypt, for a few days during our Easter Break in Dar es Salaam, Tanzania. For two blondes in Africa, Egypt was an adventure to say the least. A fantastic time. 

A few highlights: Re-routed to Yemen (almost Saudi Arabia) because of a missed connector flight, saw breathtaking pyramids and went inside them, rode camels, ate Egyptian food (koshary and fatta, yum!), visited sites where the Holy Family lived, saw the mummy of the Ramses II, enjoyed nightlife on the Nile in a city that practically never sleeps, and made sure to "Enjoy the Revolution," as the wall graffiti asserted in Tahrir Square. (April 21-26, 2011)

Click here for Easter Break in Egypt photos: "Enjoy the Revolution, Part I"

Love,

L

Photo Post: Zanzibar w/ Dave

I ran out of "free" room on Flickr, so I now have another account with Photobucket! Check out my "Zanzibar w/ Dave" album there.


Love,

LG

Photo Post: Bagamoyo, Blood Donation, Rika Tano, Birthday

About a month ago I discovered where I could upload photos! Blogspot and Facebook both don't like my internet connection here, but I won with Flickr, even though I think the site is confusing to navigate.

Anyway, photos are here! Well, some of them. I still have too many for International Day (back in November) and from safari with my family (and now with Dave).

Bookmark my photo gallery at http://www.flickr.com/photos/alifeinspired  :)

Specific Album Links
February 2011: Bagamoyo Trip w/ Erin & Heather

February 2011: Donating Blood in Africa

February 2011: Last Night w/ YoungLife Africa's Rika Tano

March 2011: Birthday in TZ

Enjoy! And drop me a line at ms.gordon@ymail.com :)


Much love,

LG

Just a Great Day

Great things happened today that made it a really good day here in TZ. An especially welcomed event since Dave left yesterday and it could have been long and sad.

A brief list:

• Went to "Swahili church" for the first time. Mbezi Chapel, just a short walk down the road. It was great. Felt God, felt love, even if I didn't understand the sermon. Hooray for understanding some of the songs though!
  
• Opened up a bag of Pepperidge Farm double chocolate milano cookies my grandma and poppy sent with Dave. Sooo tasty.
  
• Spent time with Marie, a friend and former housemate who I always feel blessed to be around.
  
• Enjoyed the breeze in the bajaj during the ride to Sea Cliffe.
  
• Ate celery for the first time in six months!! My favorite vegetable that I thought was non-existent here. Alas, I found it in the chicken salad I ordered at Africafe. DELICIOUS!
  
• Purchased and successfully downloaded Britney Spears' new album "Femme Fatale." Finally figured out the loophole on how to get music here since iTunes hates me: Amazon.com. Yay!
  
• Completely splurged and had not one but two mocha frosties w/ hazelnut.
  
• Heard from Dave via text saying he was in DC ready for the last two legs of his journey home.
  
• Now unwinding with a quiet night at home with power. A good day. No, great day.
  

LG